Here's my theory: I think weddings shouldn't be allowed until you have been married for at least 10 years. The wedding planning becomes so consuming that it seems that the reason for the wedding is forgotten. Even if you do know that there may be a problem lurking underneath like a mold, it could be pushed aside just knowing that a custom gown will be worn. (Isn't that right, Kim K?)
Imagine what it would do to the economy..so many weddings wouldn't even happen. Overpriced floral arrangements wouldn't be bought, little focus would be placed on filet or sea bass and the Chicken Dance wouldn't even be heard.
Ching and I had a moderately sized wedding--140 people (120 guests of Ching's and 20 of mine) celebrated our day. It was a beautiful day for the guests..I will talk about the wedding accessory of a stick up my butt later. While Ching really wanted the wedding, wouldn't it have been better to celebrate 10 years after the fact, that we are still together and working on our relationship? (Actually, Ching and I wouldn't even qualify for a wedding yet--it will be nine years this July.)
Is it because couple's want stuff? The couple that sent the bottle haven't registered for stuff--they have specifically asked for cash. Maybe I should send the invite back so they can get a refund on these ridiculous invites. You know, this is an Asian relative of Ching's--aren't the parents supposed to get the cash gifts? When Ching and I got married in a small ceremony before our wedding (another story, another time), Ching's grandmother hosted a small dinner at a restaurant. Ching's great uncle gave us a gift of $400. As soon as the money hit his palm, in slow motion, I saw Ching turn and give it to his grandmother. According to tradition, the parents, who host, get the gifts rather than the couple. At that moment, my tears were not tears of joy and (oh yay!), I was married.
But more likely the wedding is to make a princess for a day. You know that you can throw a party and be a princess without being married? Will you feel like a princess when it is 3 a.m. and your soul mate is creating a dutch oven? Will you feel like a princess when you can't stand the sight of each other? Will you feel like a princess when you realize how hard it is to be married?
Marriage takes work. Rather than spending countless hours on the planning, I think you have to spend countless hours earning the wedding.
And maybe at 10 years, the wedding isn't even wanted but there is a feeling of joy of still being married. Would Ching and I have a wedding in 2013 if we didn't have one in 2003? Not sure..but I am sure of who would need a bigger wedding outfit.
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