I thought that too but Rachel said that both she and Laurel would be big sisters.

Ah..with the holidays come that annoying sentimentality that leads to one thing...the tugging of my ovaries.  Of course, it's not me that has the pull for another child, it's the other Wangs.  Right, I pluralized it--I am being double teamed...by Ching AND Rachel.  (Laurel is just staying focused with being the best kid for that elf.)  Why does this happen?  Let's get it together, people....

Today Ching held a baby girl at some sort of work holiday party.  He told me how cute she was and the mom took a picture of the cuteness.  Ching hasn't received the picture yet; He is afraid the mom got his number wrong.  He has all ready forgotten how hectic the evening is with a baby.  Like this mom's making a priority of sending this picture to Ching as she is trying to feed, bathe, settle down and get her daughter to sleep.  A picture that reminds Ching how cute a young baby can be.   But he also needs to be reminded that a baby is even cuter when they are handed back to it's mother.  I must have a heart of stone because I have never seen a baby that gives me the urge to have another.  I could be looking at the sweetest baby Jesus swaddled in baby Gucci and I would probably notice the Gucci first.

Then there is Rachel and this recent parent teacher conference incident:
YPT (Younger Preschool Teacher):  "Rachel told the class some very good news yesterday."
JCW:  I say nothing...I am skeptical.
YPT:  "She said that she is going to be a big sister."
JCW:  Oh Christ... "Did she try to switch roles--say that Laurel was the little sister and now Rachel is the big sister?"  I know the answer.  I also hate the look of glee in the teachers' eyes like they are going to get another five years of daycare/pre-school tuition for the possible baby #3.
YPT:  "I thought that too but Rachel said that both she and Laurel would be big sisters.  I then asked where the baby was.  She said the baby was in your belly."
JCW:  "Yeah...first of all, that is not happening...ever."  And I never told Laurel the baby was in my belly--so incorrect.  Laurel's favorite word was uterus when I was pregnant with Rachel.  "Secondly, Rachel has expressed that her friends are becoming big sisters.  She would like a baby too...And do you think I would make Rachel the middle child?"

If this is a ploy to get a puppy at the holidays, I am leaving...for a long time.

Next year, I picture Rachel coming downstairs on Christmas morning screaming, "Where's my loot?" because she is classy like that.

This is the two year anniversary (birth?) of my blog--thank you for reading.  I haven't been as attentive to it as I should be...believe me, I have still have plenty to say just not a lot of time these days.  I can't explain why I am so busy.  I have been more present with my girls...while that means less time in front of the computer, it does mean that I am just gathering more subject matter.

So this elf thing....still don't like it.  Again, the Wang's elf is Mike.  I was purposely late to the game and just started "Mike's watch" this past weekend--I am on Day 5 of situating him prior to going to bed so the girls wake up to see where  and how Mike is waiting for them.  Out of five days, I have woken up during 3 nights realizing that I forgot to take care of that little red shit.  As soon as my alarm goes off, I jet downstairs to make sure Mike is in a new spot.  God, the pressure is killing me and I just started!  Some people started prior to Thanksgiving.

Interestingly, Rachel, the youngest, isn't interested.  She could care less--I think this is Rachel's last year believing in Santa.  Next year, I picture Rachel coming downstairs on Christmas morning screaming, "Where's my loot?" because she is classy like that.

Laurel needs to see where Mike is ...Laurel loves the surprise and truly believes in the fat man in red.  We have another few years of this.  But with this belief, the pressure is on--me, just me.  Ching has never touched Mike.  And that's another thing, Laurel flips out if anyone touches him--it hurts his magic.  I do respect her rule of that little stalker can't land upstairs when she is sleeping.  So Mike is relegated to the first floor or basement.

But then I have found the pressure causes the issue of "Elf Envy" I hear about all of the precarious situations that her friends' elves has gotten into.  What if my "Mike situations" aren't cool or creative?
LAW:  "You know Mackenzie got a gift from her elf."
JCW:  "Yeah, on Christmas.  You will too."
LAW:  "No, she got it yesterday."
JCW:  "Elves don't bring appetizer gifts up to the big day."
LAW:  "It was just a key chain."
JCW:  "Does she have a car too?"
(Sensing my pissiness, Laurel dropped the gift idea.)

For me the sole purpose of the elf was leverage.  Mike was going to watch over my girls to make sure they are good until December 25th.  There are no gifts given prior to this and the situations stress goodness and "kiss assery".  Mike does homework, cleans up and appreciates focus--you know, the Wang way.  You will not find our elf driving the Barbie vette, with Barbie riding shotgun, topless.  Or writing on a wall with a crayon.  Or leaving a trail of chocolate chips like he just poo'ed across the living room.  (Jesus Christ, this would be the only time that Rachel would be interested and I just got her to poo on the potty 5 months ago.)

So, as a parent, if I don't convey discipline, I have Barbie sized elf dressed in felt to do my work.  Yeah, I feel pretty much demoted for the next 14 days.

Make note to self--remind Laurel that her hair is long and it's easy to be pulled. I can see it in Rachel's eyes. She is a grabber.

Oh jeez, it seems to have started in full force this weekend. The girls are at each other like cats.  Back and forth--playing separately or nicely one minute and then the next, all hell is breaking loose.  Soon I will have to hide the Vaseline supply to make sure they are not rubbing it on their face anticipating a real cat fight. (Make note to self--remind Laurel that her hair is long and it's easy to be pulled.  I can see it in Rachel's eyes.  She is a grabber.)

Usually they have played together quite well or on their own.  But now, I am not sure if it's that Laurel wants more space.  Her things can't be touched.  And of course Rachel doesn't understand this.

Rachel is marking her territory; making sure that her age and size don't hinder her.  She is also more verbal--any injustice, she speaks her mind and then gets in my face.  I can hear squabbles in the next room and then those little feet, stomping to me looking for justice.  Meanwhile, I am trying to get to the bathroom because it's the only room with a lock.

Today this is what I heard:
1.  A squabble on who gets to play with a the magic wand.  It's a piece of pink plastic--I think it used to hold up a doll.  My girls have hundreds of dollars of toys and electronics and they play with this?  Perhaps for Christmas, I should give out empty shoe boxes.

2.  With the magic wand, Laurel has turned Rachel into a worm.  And Laurel refuses to reverse the spell.

3.  Rachel comes to me complaining that she is a worm and pouting that I needed to do something.  While I show her that she has arms and legs, she is insistent that she is a worm.

I, then, go into the family room, take away the wand and tell Laurel to turn Rachel into a girl rather than a worm.  And this instance only covered 10 minutes and was one squabble of several.

(Young, childless co-workers are going to ask me about my weekend and I will not be able to convey the wand/worm situation with justice.)

Since it's the holidays, I am digging through the Christmas stuff and finding my new best friend, Mike, the Wang Elf on a Shelf.  Last year my nemesis, this year, my new best friend.  He will help me.  I have Mike, but I might hide the china too.  She is young, but I can see Rachel chucking a good plate at Laurel.