All American family...girls are playing with dough or string while the adults are reading on their phones.

I would like to think that the Wangs are good tippers.  Regardless, every time they see us coming, there must be a server that says, "Oh shit."

At least once a week, Ching, Laurel, Rachel and I will go out to a sit down dinner.  These dinners are usually very casual and at a family friendly place.  But, using last night dinner at Bertucci's as an example, the Wangs seem to descend on a table like a Mack Truck.

First you have Rachel who currently likes to carry her Handy Manny Tool Kit at every outing.  She carries this kit throughout the restaurant to her seat like she is going to fix everything in her wake.  She hoists herself into her booster seat and slams her tools down.  Immediately she grabs the raw dough (that they give kids to play with) and pounds it with Pat, the hammer.

Then we have Laurel...currently Laurel's big thing is Cat's Cradle.  She is obsessed with doing each string formation over and over again.  If she didn't have the string, she would play with that dough or color with crayons.  Laurel gives a perception of being a young girl but on a turn of a dime, she is asking the server for all the juice choices before she politely asks for one.  But she wants all the choices and if she doesn't hear something that she is hoping for, she will ask...like a juice interrogation.  Curious what she will be like when she is of age and wants to know what's on tap?

(I do have to interject and give props to both my girls.  If I were a child and given raw dough to play with, I would have tried to eat it.  Laurel and Rachel have never tried to eat it...does this make me the weird one or them?)

And Ching...I have never known him to order anything but a Diet Coke but he always makes the server wait about 7 seconds, oh and surprise, he wants a Diet Coke.

As everyone is settled, the bread arrives and the way Ching, Laurel and Rachel descend on the basket, you would think they haven't eaten in weeks.  After the second basket arrives, I know that what the girls have ordered is going to be wrapped up and sent home.

Before the dinners arrive, there is such a mess of bread crumbs, butter packets, bread dough, etc.  I try to ignore this and start looking at my phone as is Ching.  All American family...girls are playing with dough or string while the adults are reading on their phones.

By the time the food arrives, Ching and I have about 10 minutes to eat before Rachel gets really bored.  Because of the dinner of rolls, the girls are good for about four bites.  After that, Ching and I are just trying to keep their butts in the chair.  Usually we need more than 10 minutes so Rachel gets my phone.  Laurel then balks and Ching gives up his phone with a slight pout like he is 4.  The servers briefly check in like they are approaching a wasps nest.

This is usually the point when I admonish myself for not making dinner.  It would have been quicker, neater cheaper, more tasty and without judgement from other diners.

Finally we are ready to go and Laurel wants to enter this $20 gift certificate drawing.  To win, you have to guess the correct amount of rigatoni in a jar.  Both Laurel and Ching want to use some sort of math estimation exercise.  Rachel doesn't give a rip, she is singing by the door--I am hoping she isn't performing for spare change.  I ignore Ching and Laurel and put 210 as the answer.

You know, if I win that $20, I may not tell and just go and eat by myself.