I feel like that Cookie the cook from City Slickers--"The food is hot, brown (or orange) and plenty of it."

I need to boycott making dinner.  I can fend for myself and let the rest of the Wangs become hunters and gatherers...actually they would just be gatherers of snacks, dairy, sliced apples and take out.

CCW:  "What's for dinner?"
JCW:  My shoulders drop--why does this matter?  Are you not going to eat it?  "Maybe you can wait and be surprised."
CCW:  "You know if you told me now, it would still be a surprise...to me now."
JCW:  "We are having salmon, steamed carrots and quinoa."  Yes, I know--the dinner has an orange theme.  It's not very creative--but it's been a long day.  I feel like that Cookie the cook from City Slickers--"The food is hot, brown (or orange) and plenty of it."
CCW:  "We are having salmon again?"
JCW:  Jesus Christ--it's not cat food.  And we only have fish once a week. "It was the fish that was on sale this week"
CCW:  "What other fish did they have?"
JCW:  "Nothing that was on sale--this is it."  I can't justify spending 12.99 on a different fish when there is perfectly good salmon at 7.99.

Same conversation, different Wang.
JCW:  "Hey Rachel, I am making you and Laurel chicken nuggets tonight."
RJW:  "I don't like chicken nuggets"
JCW:  "These are DINOSAUR chicken nuggets and you love these."  The fact that I use a little sing song voice when I say dinosaur makes me die a little inside.
RJW:  "Okay, but I don't want the red ones."
JCW:  I have no idea what this means but I just move on to the task at hand.  Maybe I should get one of those hats that says "Cookie".

DINNER!!!
JCW:  Jesus Christ--Where are they?  Three minutes ago, they are sniffing around like rodents and now I have to lure them back into the dining room.
RJW:  "I don't want my fruit--I don't like it."
LAW:  "Can I eat her mango?"
JCW:  "Laurel can you just focus on what is on your plate?"  Maybe she is a hunter..
RJW:  "The orange has white stuff on it--can you take it off?"
JCW:  I look over at Ching and he is eating at breakneck speed--he is just trying to eat without tasting it.  He is lucky.  I could have served kale.  I can't get all of the white off of the orange to Rachel's satisfaction.  I just want to enjoy my dinner even though I will admit blandness.  

I think tomorrow night, I will just leave out cereal boxes and milk.

..And then proceeded to give herself a yogurt facial..

Last night I made grilled chicken breasts and stuffed red bell peppers for dinner.  The peppers were stuffed with saffron rice, provolone and pine nuts--baked to perfection. (I will admit that I lean on my culinary prowess to avoid other activities. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about..)

Anyway, Laurel told me that it was the best dinner ever.  It would warm my crusty ticker if she actually ate the above dinner. Her dinner consisted of 2 chicken nuggets left over from McDonalds, 1 slice of leftover Bertucci's cheese pizza, berries and cantalope.  Rachel was no better.  She refused my initial offering (of chicken and rice) and just ate yogurt.  Most of it anyway, and then proceeded to give herself a yogurt facial.

Why have I become a short order cook?  Sometimes I do it out of laziness.  Rather than argue and barter (3 more bites and then a cookie), I just cover the veggie food group with the V-8 V-Fusion juice and protein with chicken nuggets.  Dairy, fruit and carbs are a snap.  But should I really give either of them a choice or cave?  When I was a kid, what was served for dinner, was your dinner.

There is a tiny sliver of me that thinks they are going to starve, and I know that they are definitely not going to starve.  Laurel is growing like a weed--she is 98 percentile for height.  I joke that her real daddy is Yao Ming.   (Mr Ching Wang is 5'4") And Rachel..well Rachel is definitely her father's daughter..nice and robust.  She could live off her left thigh for a week.

I have created this monster..it's the bed I have made..wearing two chef hats every night..Julia Child for Ching and Rachel Ray for the girls.