Before I make this pretty harsh statement, I want you to know that I am totally clear headed...no chardonnay breath...

Before I make this pretty harsh statement, I want you to know that I am totally clear headed, no chardonnay breath, no Citron buzz...sober as a judge. Here it goes: If Ching ever leaves me and I have to assume the single mother role, I will hunt him down and kill him.

The last three days (going into the forth) haven't been bad.  I can do it (parent alone) I just don't want to.  Beep and Blare (I mean, Laurel and Rachel) were fed regularly--not the best meals that contain four food groups but they went to bed full.  We all made it to our destinations this morning in clean clothes albeit a little late.  And the house is mess...but it's still standing.

Weeks ago, when Ching told me that he was going to this conference in Florida (I would have felt better if it were in Detroit), immediately he wanted to know if my mom could come down to help.  I shouldn't need my mom to mother my own children alone.  While she is a very good resource, I like to use her when we absolutely need her like when one of the girls is sick.  I don't want to use my imagined allotment just so Ching can ease his mind of any guilt because I am home with his children and  he is bellying up to some buffet for the third time.

While I am in the home stretch, I am tired. (That freakin' snowstorm didn't help.) I don't know how single moms do it.  Tonight, with Ching coming back tomorrow evening, I feel like that junior high girl looking the clock, willing the parents to come home early so I can take my sitter fee and get the hell away from those damn kids.  And these are my kids!  Tonight, I got both girls before six but I did forget my wallet as I went to pick up dinner therefore two trips were needed.  Rachel got poop on my clothes.  It didn't seem like a big deal ( it's just poop) until Laurel looked at me and told me that "she seriously felt bad for me."  And this was the third night in a row that Rachel cried for her daddy when I put her to bed.  Obviously she has a favorite.

I am just looking forward to a little alone time..perhaps and hour or two.  That alone time as I shoveled the driveway so didn't count.