As soon as that light was in my face...I was hoping for my girl, Tiny, two cells down.

I have had very little caffeinated soda in the past few days.  (Over the past couple of weeks I was consuming at least four cans daily..the first one prior to 6 in the morning...you know, just for a little kick.)  I am tired but perhaps it's because one of my kids isn't sleeping through the night.  Not Rachel...Laurel.

Laurel has kicked me out of my bed for three consecutive nights.  Apparently (I know, it's bad to doubt your own kid) but she has had bad dreams.  She wakes up and cannot go back to sleep.  (As a cynical person first, wife and mother dead last..my reaction is whatever, learn to live with the mucousy snore of your partner.  Yeah, Laurel and Rachel may not want to look forward to" the night before becoming the wife" talk.)

Getting back to Laurel...first of all, we had to stop her from bellowing, "Mommy...Daddy!" in the middle of the night. (How come I am first now when usually I am not?)
We gave her a flashlight with the hope that, even though, she is sleeping in a lit room, she can take the light and guide herself (8 feet) to our bedroom and wake us up.  It seems like a good idea to give a child a flashlight at 8:30 in the evening...but at 2:30 in the morning, it scared the shit out of me.  To see this little kid, with a light directly in my face, whispering, "Mommy"...holy crap, you might as well throw a cold bucket of water on me and put me in a women's prison.  As soon as that light was in my face...I was hoping for my girl, Tiny, two cells down.

Why does she always come to my side?  More likely than not, I am not the cool, comforting parent.

Laurel is polite (she does get that from me)  to let me know that she is there (with that freakin' light that Ching gave her).  But with one move on my part, she jumps into our bed like a freakin' spider monkey.  If she could stay in the center of our bed, that would be fine, but she clings to me like a snake looking for warmth...then starts to snore...then starts to run in her sleep.  Laurel kicks me a couple of times in the crotch.  Yeah...that's enough for me.

Over the past couple of nights, I have left my side of the bed to the guest bed in the den.

How do I stop this?  Do I try to talk (and re-live) the dream.  Should I just say no?

Not sure...I am three days into not eating bacon daily, drinking wine or soda...my judgement is a little clouded.